behind closed doors

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7 tips on how to deal with the Imposter Syndrome

Blog by Donny Walford - Founder and Managing Director of behind closed doors

Women, even in the most senior leadership positions, are more prone to express a sense of self-doubt than men. Some will admit that they think they are a fraud and are just waiting for someone to tap them on the shoulder to tell them so, even though they have attained success in their careers and demonstrated many achievements through pure hard work and taking risks.

This self-doubt may make women more likeable and empathetic individuals, yet it leads to a lack of self-confidence because of a lack of confidence.

Lacking confidence will prevent putting yourself forward for opportunities that do exist and taking the necessary risks.

Women are more hesitant about believing in, or selling/promoting their own capabilities when applying for a promotion or new position. I call this the ‘cringe factor.’ For some reason, women feel they need to tick all the boxes before applying for a role whereas men will “give it a crack.” Men will learn on the job, women believe they need to be fully competent before applying. This is a mindset women must change…and you don’t need more training or education!

Women are also very self-critical and quite critical of other women. I constantly hear women state that they ‘could do better” so it’s really important to have the confidence to seek and accept all opportunities.

These seven tips and tools may help you deal with the imposter syndrome:

Tip 1: Create self-awareness

First acknowledge and understand it exists and remember how good you are. It's like training a muscle, you have to keep working at it.

Tip 2: Challenge yourself

Take on this challenge: do something you are afraid of…every day. This exercise alone will help build your confidence. It may be as simple as making a phone call you feel uncomfortable to make.

Tip 3: Relieve self-doubt

Quiet the voices in your head (turn the negative talk into positive talk to relieve the self-doubt). Know yourself and be content with who you are. If you aren't happy with yourself, you are the only one who can change that.

Tip 4: Develop healthy habits

Change the habits and patterns that cause you to procrastinate, create self-doubt and paralyse you to take risks and move forward. Discipline alone doesn't change habits. Identify what the habit is and replace the trigger for the habit which will then change your behaviour. Associate your trigger(s) with your habit(s). To change a habit, set up a schedule so that a trigger precedes each habit.

Tip 5: Believe in yourself and your abilities

Change your language from I can't to yes I can!

Tip 6: Remember that the journey comes before the destination

Take baby steps to reach an overall objective or goal, and ask yourself at the end of each day, "which step have I reached today"? It's like eating an elephant - small mouthfuls at a time.

Tip 7: Be grateful

At the end of each day, identify what you are grateful for.